DVD Tuesday 6/14/11

Hey Folks,

Sorry it’s been so long, shit happens. Anyway luckily this week we actually have one and 1/2 genre flicks to give a brief description of and why/why not you should see them so let’s get right to it.

This one got lost on the way to grandma's house

Red Riding Hood– Amanda Seyfried goes over to the sparkly side in a decidedly Twilight-esque adaptation of the classic fairy tale.

BELIEVE-

  1. The little red riding hood legend is one of my favorite fairytales, rife with dark imagery and violent subtext (and you know…text).
  2. I’ve become quite the fan of Amanda Seyfried. Her more mature turns in Alpha Dog and a guilty pleasure Jennifer’s Body amplify the good will from Mean Girls.
BEWARE-
  1. It’s rated PG-13. While I don’t like to discriminate based on rating alone, this pretty much nixes a super violent retelling of the classic. Leading a movie with this much young star power and a movie poster by Hot Topic into the dangerous parts of the woods.
  2. You saw the trailer people. This is Twilight sans sparkly vampires. It is another in the new trend of gothic romances (not gothic themed romances, romances for goth kids…and 34 year old women who never left 7th grade) that have been popping up ever since Stephanie Meyer crawled out from beneath her proverbial rock.

There's a 100% chance that this is totally crap

Battle: Los Angeles- I actually saw this one in theaters and was frankly a little underwhelmed, it’s an alien invasion movie…nuff said.

CHARGE-

  1. It’s an alien invasion movie, there are aliens, and explosions, and lots of military personnel doing awesomely sci-fi badass shit.
  2. The creature design, while entirely CGI (as far as I can tell) is interesting enough that the first time you see the enemy you aren’t disappointed.
  3. Michelle Rodriguez as (act shocked) a vaguely butch and really hot Naval Officer.

I'm totally cool with typecasting.

RETREAT
  1. This movie is a cliche gaettling gun- if you don’t like formulaic predictability in your movies (and not all of us do) this one is going to irk you a bit.
  2. One dimensional characters- this is sort of an extension of the first point but I mean you could have taken these guys out of a form manual for military/sci-fi movies. I’m pretty sure that’s where they got the dialogue.
So in short, if it’s your thing see Battle LA, if Red Riding Hood is your thing…. you need to seek professional help, or possibly just get laid.
Your critical Screamstress,
~Fright Dyke
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One Response to “DVD Tuesday 6/14/11”

  1. Yeah, I don’t think I’ll be watching Red Riding Hood. I think if they were going for a more contemporary-style remake, the title alone could have been better… “Little Red” or something. And it definitely should have been rated R with wolf violence.

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