Movie Review-The Evil Dead

Hi Folks,

 

So since it’s still totally Sunday, we’re going to be doing up a major cult favorite. The first of a very groovy trilogy.

 

 

The Evil Dead

 

 

 

Fast Facts

 

In all fairness, most of the fannishness is attached more solidly to Evil Dead 2 and Armyof Darkness because they’re gory and intentionally absurd. But lost in the Bruce Campbell and Sam Raimi worship is a fact that I think is fairly important. The first Evil Dead is mean to be, and is scary.

 

like legit

The story centers around a group of five friends Ash, his girlfriend Linda, his sister  Cheryl and his friends Scott and Shelley. They rent a cabin in the middle of nowhere for the weekend. When they discover an ancient human skin bound book called the necronomicon, left by the previous owner and play a tape of said owner reading from the book; well yeah…they’re totally fucked.

 

Only slightly less dangerous than 'Lord of the Rings'

Cast

 

If chins could kill

Bruce Campbell- Is Ash our hero and the best damn B-movie actor EVER  those of you who are losers may associate him with Burn Notice, I weep for you.

 

You poor poor woman

Ellen Sandweiss-Plays Cheryl, Ash’s sister and the only person not paired off. So you know our first victim. She does a nice job too, very much the outsider and Ms. Sandweiss is clearly a trooper…you’ll find out why later.

 

You're so pretty now...wait till later

Betsy Baker- Plays Linda, Ash’s girlfriend and creeperess later on. Does a nice job with what she’s been given. Which is essentially perfect girlfriendhood so we can feel bad for Ash later.

 

Dude don't go in the woods...just trust me I'll tell you later

Richard DeManicor- Plays Scott, Ash’s friend and he’s actually responsible for more of the ass kicking than Ash in this one. So generic 80’s douchebag with a pragmatic side.

 

You are the lost deadite

Theresa Tilly- Plays Shelley, Scott’s girlfriend, she’s sort of unremarkable. But that’s mostly the script.

 

 

Observations

 

Evil Dead is a lot of things- many intentionally so. It’s funny for one, gory to the extreme, very disturbing and yes it is in fact scary.

 

This is Raimi’s first full length feature and he brings a lot to the proverbial table. The cinematography for one is very cool; the zoomy, creepy dead cam is one of my very favorites.

 

There are lots of really good scenes in this film, but since this is Fright Dyke there are three worth talking about.

 

 

  1. The Forest

 

Cheryl seriously gets a majorly bum deal in this thing. She’s sort of the outsider from the start. She’s auto carving the necronomicon in what was probably a very expensive sketchbook and…well she turns into a deadite and spends most of the movie trapped in the cellar and…well…

 

Ok there’s really no way around this…

 

She gets raped by a tree.

 

Yeah…yup…this is one of the most awkward, uncomfortable scenes I’ve ever witnessed on film. I can’t and don’t really feel the need to describe it.

 

It’s horrifying and you’re just going to have to take my word for it.

 

This is as close as you're getting to a picture of this...trust me it's for the best

  1. Deadite Linda

 

Linda gets stabbed in the ankle with a pencil by Cheryl immediately after she turns for an extended and completely unnecessary length of time.  Apparently whatever supernatural force turns you into a deadite finds your SAT weapon of choice just as conductive as say transmission of bodily fluids or tree rape.

 

A DIxon? A Dixon Cheryl? Everyone knows Ticonderoga is better

If you make a single ‘wood’ joke you are going straight to hell.

 

Tha...

 

Stop.

Do you know how I got this face?

Linda is like a creepy doll. Her voice is high pitched and sing-songy and she has ridiculously Joker-esque face (well before Heath put on the freak lips) and pretty much all she does is laugh like a fucking psychotic trying to drive Ash (and the audience) completely batshit. It’s rather effective. Insanity is for some reason far more frightening than undeaded-ness and you’re begging Ash to dismember her about 30 seconds in.

 

  1. Ending of Cheryl and Scott

That's an extremely odd color choice Mr. Raimi

The final battle between Ash and the remaining deadites is fantastically gory. Scott and Cheryl essentially melt away and disassemble via some truly awful claymation effects. I mean you see EVERYTHING skin, organs, muscle blood and some bone. It’s disgusting and totally awesome.

 

Dude he's made of ketchup!

 

Now I hadn’t watched the original Evil Dead in a while and I noticed two things this time around that bear mentioning.

 

First: Ash’s natural enemy is apparently shelving. For real with Cheryl and then again with Shelley he is thrown into the world’s cheapest IKEA shelving units and lays there pinned beneath it like an idiot for what would have been hours if Scott didn’t help his ass.

 

AAAAAAAHHH an entertainment unit! My arch nemesis!

This is what happens to Ash sans Boomstick.

 

 

Secondly: Uh I’m not sure that this is entirely accurate; but Scott leaves right. He goes to look for a path and he hasn’t been very badly hurt by any of the deadites. He comes back all bloody and beat up-dies within hours and comes back possessed. Which wouldn’t be noteworthy if that wasn’t EXACTLY what happened to Cheryl.

 

You Fucking Monsters

 

Dude…did Sam Raimi have Scott tree raped off screen?

 

Like for real…the pieces are all there…you all see it right? I’m not the only one seeing this?

 

 

Final Thoughts

 

Evil Dead is one of those movies that’s just fun. You aren’t going to learn anything, you aren’t going to marvel at the plot but you are going to have a really good gory time. Campbell and Raimi will have changed your movie life forever.

 

And how you view your basement

 

All in all a 7 out of 10

 

(1.5 points deducted per tree rape.. you sick bastard)

 

 

Your groovy Screamstress,

 

 

~Fright Dyke

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