Movie Review- Friday the 13th Part 3

Hi Folks,

 

So we’re really up against the wall here but I’m holding out hope, today among other things (no sleep till November for me) we’re dealing with the movie that made the icon (fashion wise anyway) for our third Friday Friday, I give you appropriately enough:

 

 

 

Friday the 13th Part 3

 

 

Fast Facts

 

Made in 1982 and again directed by Steve Miner the third installment of the Friday franchise is kind of an odd but well loved duck.  Also presented in 3D the first time Hollywood thought that was a good idea.

 

oy

Our story centers around some college kids who are staying at a cabin near Crystal Lake…guess what happens.

 

A summer of fun and a long and fulfilling life?...yeah i'm gonna go with no

 

Cast

 

Jason's final girls are getting kinda haggard looking

Dana Kimmell-Plays Chris Higgins, her family owns the cabin they’re staying in. She does decently but to be honest this sequel is the one where the acting really starts to nosedive.

 

You're going to have something happen to that pretty face of yours

Paul Kratka-Plays Rick, Chris’s sort of ex-boyfriend. This guy reads his lines like they’re written on his arms somewhere.

 

This is only about half as painful as childbirth

Tracie Savage-Plays Chris’s pregnant friend Debbie, she’s actually one of the better performers.

The fact that the only photo i could get of you has you shirtless is pretty much a death warrant

 

Jeffrey Rogers-Plays Debbie’s baby daddy Andy, reputedly got the part because he could walk on his hands…it shows.

 

She has such lovely eyes...

Catherine Parks-Plays Vera, the poor pretty girl duped into being the ugly awkward guy’s date. She does pretty well and has one of the kitschier deaths in the movie.

 

he just screams 'leading man' doesn't he?

Larry Zerner-Plays Shelly the socially awkward drama nerd. You’re going to be extremely thankful when Jason puts him out of his misery.

 

The real Leading Man

Richard Brooker- Plays the big guy, this is actually one of Jason’s scarier incarnations and Mr. Brooker is a large part of that.

 

 

Observations

 

Ok Friday the 13th Part III is one of the first ‘rooting for the killer’ sequels because frankly there has been little to no attempt to make the plot make sense anymore. We’re here to watch Jason dismember horny teenagers and this time it’s in 3D.

 

And the occasional bike gang

Don’t get me wrong, they did in fact write a script, it’s just sort of stupid. The dialogue is terrible and the acting is terrible so it’s pretty much just terrible all the way around.

 

You'll enjoy this though

I LOVE this movie.

 

Come again?

This is where Friday really starts to get fun. You’re still getting the jumps and bumps and fakeout scares but now it’s so easy to enjoy the carnage because you just don’t give two shits about the characters anymore. It’s kind of a guilty pleasure thing but seriously sometimes you just want to watch people get messed up and that is exactly what this movie is for.

 

There's also juggling

There are a few minor inconsistencies in this entry (and by miner I mean you could drive a Semi through the plot holes and continuity issues) for starters this film is supposed to take place immediately after the events of the second movie (if the first twenty minutes look familiar to you it’s because they just spliced the ending of the second one in and added a title screen) and there have been some major changes to the reality here in the less than 24 hours that have passed.

 

What happened to Grizzly Adams?

Jason is now bald and he is differently and more dramatically deformed, he is also taller and no longer has a massive machete wound in his shoulder. I mean I know we went and got a new actor but you could have at least copied the makeup job.

 

This entry is particularly notable for three reasons franchise wise.

 

The first is that this is the first film that doesn’t involve Camp Crystal Lake as a primary setting, the lake is still a focal point but we aren’t actually at the camp.

 

You thought that was safer didn't you?

The second is this is the only recorded instance of Jason using a projectile type weapon (he uses a spear gun on Vera) this is clearly part of the 3D gimmick but it still just doesn’t feel right.

 

Put Down the Gun!

Finally and most importantly: this is the movie where Jason dons the hockey mask for the first time. Which essentially means that this is the first movie where Jason looks like Jason, and Paramount figured out that they could brand the shit out of this thing.

Above: merchandising...where the real money from the movie is made

As we’re firmly into sequel land here we’re just going to go with the top three kills in this one.

 

 

  1. Rick

 

 

Rick is sort of a douchebag, but he’s a large, strong looking douchebag and Jason has a very particular MO for people who dare challenge him physically. If I ever end up in a slasher movie; this is how I want to die.

 

Holy crap it looks so real!

Jason crushes his head in his bare hands. Not exactly creative but certainly impressive and since it becomes a franchise staple it’s first use is notworthy.

 

 

  1. Chili

 

I didn’t include her in the cast list because she’s basically ‘Female Pot Smoker’ but she does in fact get one of the cooler kills in the series. Jason stabs her in the stomach with a red hot fire poker.

 

Do you smell something burning?

Ouch.

 

 

  1. Andy

 

This is my favorite kill from this sequel, largely because he never sees it coming and it is an extremely unlikely way to die. Andy is walking on his hands down the hallway; Jason is a large man with a large machete; Andy suffers the natural progression of this which is a large vertical wound starting at the groin and ending about halfway up his torso.

 

Above: imminent FAIL

I nearly peed myself laughing the first time I watched it.

 

The fact that he then gets folded in half and placed in the rafters just makes it better.

 

Easy storage is important in a corpse

 

There is one problematic kill in this movie. If it wasn’t so undeniably wrong it would have made the top three because it’s done very well and the gore effects are fantastic. As I mentioned in the cast list Vera dies via harpoon to the eye (ouch). As I also mentioned this is the only known instance of Jason using a projectile weapon (apart from the horrifically bad remake) and while I understand this was entirely due to the fact that the film was shot for 3D exploitative goodness (watching this in 2D is hilarious just for spotting the obvious 3D gags) there’s just something fundamentally wrong about it.

 

Though it did look pretty good

This is a slasher movie; you know why they call them slasher movies? Because the deaths are largely blade related. And while the occasional hand to hand combat is fine and usually very satisfying the very nature of the subgenre is meant to be physically brutal and the idea of Jason or any other masked slasher using a gun of any kind sort of ruins the feel of the movie. It’s almost impersonal.

 

That's more like it

Now there is one more thing we have to discuss about this one. Honestly this movie has one of the more frightening sequences in the series and coming after what has been a largely amusing film it sort of catches you off guard.

 

After Chris puts an axe in Jason’s head (making film accurate Jason costumes easily spottable; if there’s no crack in the upper right ‘corner’ they’re doing it wrong) she gets on a canoe and floats out into the middle of the lake.

 

And they call that shit protective gear?

When she looks up however; she sees this:

 

Uh.....crap

Now for some reason; Jason maskless running out of that house like a giddy schoolboy is one of the scariest bits of film I’ve ever seen, because there’s no where for her to go. She’s stuck in the middle of a goddamn lake, all he has to do is wait her out.

 

Perhaps do some Shakespeare for her in the mean time

The fact that we get the payoff to the scare in a decidedly different manner is just gravy. Luckily Steve Miner is just as OCD as I am:

 

 

I love symmetry

 

Final Thoughts

 

Friday the 13th Part III is the first example of what most people think of when they think of the franchise. Jason in a hockey mask slaughtering nondescript teens for an hour and a half is the bread and butter of the series. This one is long on gore and short on plot but sometimes that’s exactly what you’re looking for.

 

Let's face it THIS is what you're looking for

 

All in all a 6 out of 10

 

 

 

Your anti-projectile Screamstress,

 

 

 

~Fright Dyke

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